Senergy a way to solve life problems in 3 steps

I found this really good article from Monergy  it might be helpful

Just to be clear, this blog post will show you how to solve any life problem in three steps; but they are not necessarily three EASY steps, nor is this a method that is guaranteed to occur quickly. How much time it will take is up to you, and the type of energy that is applied to the problem.
Step 1- Refrain from the activity or relationship causing you distress.
This first step may be the most obvious, but is often the most difficult to do. That’s because the first step involves identifying what the problem causing issues are, and then requires that you take action. Most people can identify the source of their problems in some fashion, but it is often inertia that must be overcome to start the process that solves what is wrong. If we are in a bad relationship, or we dislike our job, the first step would involve disengaging from that relationship or job. If we are unemployed, or don’t feel we have sufficient funds at our disposal, the first step might be to engage in activities that will bring us more money, and to look at unproductive time as something we need to let go of. As usual, the key here is energy, and at each step we want to tune into a better and more effective energy. All the tools we need, such as sincerity, good effort, generosity, no expectations, taking advantage of what is available, etc., should be employed here to maximize effectiveness.
Step 2- Release the energy of the activity/relationship.
Once we have succeeded in actually disengaging from that relationship or activity, we need to make a conscious effort to release the energy that we have absorbed from the time spent in that relationship or job. Many methods exist for this release, but each individual should choose what works best. It could be increased exercise, starting a program of regular meditation, learning a new language, taking a short or extended trip. The important thing is these activities are designed to let go of the energy associated with what we have already stopped, whether it’s a relationship or job related activity.
Step3- Rebalance your energy to impose safeguards against repetition/falling back.
Everything is a process, and getting yourself out of a bad relationship or job/financial situation is no exception. Repeated efforts are necessary to establish new energy patterns, Like every other process, rebalancing your energy takes sustained efforts, and may include
temporary setbacks; don’t worry, it is perfectly normal. To the extent that you have spent sufficient time in the two preceding steps, this rebalancing will be so affected. When rebalancing is clearly working or nearly complete, expect to feel periods of intense calm and happiness: you are emerging from that black hole!
Each of us is constantly engaged in the above three steps on such a wide variety of issues.
In order to maintain some degree of happiness these days, it is so important to use these mechanisms to “clean sweep” our energy field.

Healing Yourself

I want to share some of the observations I have made on how the workplace and relationships that has caused such unnecessary emotional suffering and yes actual physical illness; and I also want to suggest some ways to cope with all of this.
If there is anything I have learned about human beings and energy, it is this:

We are like sponges in that we absorb whatever energy is around us; this is why we have to be so careful what and who we surround ourselves with.

If you don’t yet buy this, just think about that friend of yours(we all have them) who thinks he or she is stupid because that’s what they were told their whole life: they are really some of the most intelligent people you or I have met. And remember this: as much as anyone tries, it is impossible to separate or compartmentalize your life so that your business life doesn’t affect your personal life; energy cannot be limited like that.
When we are young and fresh out of school, we don’t always think we can pick and choose our first job because the “energy feels right.” More often than not, we have financial and personal constraints(family obligations, school loans, car loans, etc) that dictate our choices. So for most of us, at one time or another, we are going to be exposed to a brutal form of energy in the workplace that could and does wreak havoc with our minds and bodies. When we have these experiences, we absorb this energy with different effects on our emotional/physical bodies. As a result, a certain amount of pain accompanied by a variety of “dis-eases” may occur.
People talk about genetic pre-disposition to certain diseases: I don’t buy it- I have a different take on things: I think that whether or not we actually develop a particular “dis-ease” is (of course based upon energy absorption), and is more a factor of affinity, proximity, and frequency of association. That means that the value system and energy of the people we are closest to at work and home could be getting us sick, and we may not be consciously aware of it at all. In fact, some people develop “sympathetic dis-eases” that mirror the dis-eases of those they are close to. Also, there is almost always a certain emotional disharmony or imbalance in which “dis-eases” flourish. I truly believe that if someone is extremely strong, emotionally balanced,, and most importantly very aware, even faced with a torrent of sustained unhealthy energy , dis-ease need not occur.
We now live in a society in which each of us is never too far removed from either our own stresses or dis-eases, or those of our friends and loved ones. As I see it, there are three ways to deal with these life issues:

1. Medicate the pain away(the choice of increasing numbers of people)
2. Dull the pain with alcohol, drugs, overeating(and other distractions)
3. Find ways to identify and release the pain.

As you might have guessed, I favor choice number three. Choices one and two will never rid you of the underlying problem: they are temporary fixes. Choice number three is of course the most difficult, because it requires something in ever diminishing supply: honest self-reflection- and I mean really honest self-reflection. This may mean facing it squarely and digging deeply until you find the center, or the cause of this “dis-ease.” No easy task for sure, but definitely worth the effort.
Here’s how I see it: if there is any sense of entitlement in this life, this is it: Everyone has the right(and I think personal obligation too) to release the energy that may be causing a particular “dis-ease;” there is no reason on earth why anyone needs to walk around being controlled by past traumatic events, no matter how horrible. Release is available to each of us, but remember that releasing or letting go of these things is a process, just like anything else. And of course, everyone needs to find the perfect vehicle that accomplishes this release.

Problem solving option 2

Here are some steps towards solving problems, however to solve each problem may take time depending on the problem.  Be patient and follow each step through no matter how long it takes.  If there are many issues on the table, list the issues and pick the most important one first.  Once you follow the steps, you will see the results and reward yourself with that milkshake, or a hike to celebrate!  As you spend the energy to solve each problem, you will feel relief and better about yourself.  I feel that it is always important to reflect in our lives the things we want or need to change.  The reality is that things never remain the same, and growth is good!

Here is one of many possible models of problem solving.

1. Problem identification What is my concern?
2. Goal definition What do I want to achieve or change?
3. Brainstorming What can I do?
4. Consequences What might happen?
5. Decision How should I do it?
6. Implementation Do it!
7. Evaluation Did it work? 

The steps are defined in more detail, remember to take your time!

1. Problem identification
Try to give a precise description of your problems. You should try to focus on behaviours or skill deficits.
2. Goal definition
You should try to set a precise goal of your efforts. This should be a realistic aim of improvement (not "I want to feel better"). Ask yourself: "What do I want to change or achieve right now?"
3. Brainstorming / Generation of alternatives.
Try to think of all possible ways to achieve your goal. Think of successful ways of solving problems or achieving your goals in the past. Use your creativity and do not restrict yourself in any way. Even nonsensical or unusual ways might be worth to consider.
Write all alternatives on a blank sheet of paper!
4. Consider all consequences.
Now it is time to think about the positive or negative consequences of all possible alternatives. Think about any outcome or difficulties of your approaches.
This step can be split into substeps:

1. What are the advantages? It is better to look at the advantages before looking at the disadvantages, since if you start looking at the disadvantages you may get so dissillusioned that you cannot think of any advantages.
2. Whare are the risks, what care is needed, what problems can occur?
3. How do you intuitively feel about the alternatives?

5. Make your choice of one possible alternative!
It is important to make a clear choice and define a time limit for an attempt to reach your goal.
6. Do it (Implementation of your decision)
Do not worry about being successful. Just do it and see what happens...
7. Evaluation

Changing behavior

If you want to change your behavior or a bad habit, like find a better job, or change your relations with people, it might be helpful to divide them into smaller objectives.  Start with one that comes first then set new objectives.  There is no need to make a list of objectives first.

Every objective must be clearly defined; e.g., if you want to reduce your weight, you may begin by deciding to take more exercise, but this is not all clearly defined.  It would be better to say that you intend to walk or cycle for 30 minutes each day.

Don't strive for perfection, instead of 30 minutes each day, decide to walk/cycle 30 minutes 5 days a week.  This leaves you room to achieve your goal.

If you want to make a big change, divide your objectives into a series of small goals or sub-goals.  This creates a step by step process towards obtaining your larger goal.  For example, your home is not organized and you want to re-organize your home.  Start with 30 minutes each day or 5 days a week with one room at a time.  Or you can decide to clean one room at a time on each Saturday when you have more time to complete your task.

Make your goals reasonable, do not create a goal that would be unrealistic and not obtainable.
There is never any hurry to make these changes, if you are working on the change, then you are already in the process of creating the change!

It is important to balance your life, instead of adding more stress into your life by creating unreasonable tasks.